Picnic pants.
Really? Really? You can’t just bring a blanket? You want to walk around with the picnic on your pants?
This Banana case holder.
Um, bananas already come with a case it’s called a banana.
This diet water.
This potty training device that comes with an iPad stand.
Because potty training needs to be even messier.
This “Daddle” for “horsing around”.
Previously called your dad’s back.
Snapback fedoras.
Because fedoars aren’t horrible enough.
Inflatable unicorn horns for cats.
I think the cat will pass on this.
These fashionable “Morning Chicness bags”.
Because even when women are barfing from morning sickness they have to look pretty.
This girlfriend lap pillow
This is just creepy.
These shoes.
No. Just no.
This Ramen fan.
Or, you know, just waiting a little bit for your food to cool like your mother taught you.
This pumpkin computer.
There are real needs when it comes to computers. This is not one of them.
This very literal take on hand soap.
Which is apparently “musk scented” on purpose?!?!
Nutella shots.
Just use a spoon for Pete’s sake.
This umbrella with a watergun handle.
These jean sandles
Just use the fabric for something else. Please.
This screaming vase.
How about not wasting 15 dollars on something when you already own a pillow?
This world’s largest coffee cup.
PUT THE COFFEE DOWN YOU’VE HAD ENOUGH.
This pair of “America Sunglasses”.
They don’t even cover all of your eyes. WHY.
Any variation on this.
Just use your creativity elsewhere.
The french fry holder.
Pretty sure this already exists and it’s called your cup holder.
Burger paraphernalia.
Evaluate your life choices.
These hand gloves called “Handerpants”.
Please just find a better use of fabric.
This lap desk for your steering wheel.
NO. THIS IS AN ACCIDENT WAITING TO HAPPEN WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU HUMANS?
These “Snuggle Wings”.
A STRAIGHT JACKET FOR YOUR BABY?!
These shoes that come with a bult-in tent.
It’s okay. Just bring a backpack. It will be okay.
This human hand dog leash.
Why, humans, why?
And, of course, Segways.
NOPE. Innovate elsewhere.
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#27 - This one's actually pretty good. Used to wrap my kids in their blanket to help them sleep when they were babies. Really works. They relax pretty much right away. No flopping all around and waking themselves up.