I ended up using this borrowed phone from LeTV, the "Netflix of China." It was fast, had all the apps and features I needed, and it costs only about $100. I'd buy one in a heartbeat if they were available in the US. The only drawback was the camera, which wasn't as good as the iPhone's. I ended up taking nearly all these pictures on my (otherwise useless) iPhone 6S.
But man, you do this with unknows from the internet ...
What level of autisme is it ?