Genius.

How about some road flares, a bumper jack and vaseline?

probably the only thing you're spending any effort on is waving the barcode in the general vicinity of the laser scan.

first day on the job probably taught you very nicely not to give a dang about what the customers looked like, let alone what they're buying.

gigantes, yu are known as a buzz kill!

Very true.
I worked at Wal-Mart and if anyone there cared about anything they wouldn't be there.

duct tape, a shovel, and garbage bags. Goin' treasure hunting!