-Don’t use the word “closure” or ever expect it in real life.
-If you are wittier than you are handsome, avoid loud clubs.
-Date women outside your social set. You’ll be surprised.
-If it’s got velvet ropes and lines, walk away unless you know someone.
-You cannot have a love affair with whiskey because whiskey will never love you back.
-If you believe in evolution, you should know something about how it works.