There are a lot of different opinions when it comes to splitting the bill on a date. However, according to Emily Post’s Etiquette, the “official” rule states that, “for a first date at least, the person who asks for the date should pay unless both parties agree in advance to share expenses.”

Candice Jalili, the Senior Sex + Dating Writer at Elite Daily, seconds this. “As far as I’m concerned, the guy should pay for the first date. And if he really wants this to go somewhere, he should pay for the second as well,” she wrote. “After that, I’ll be more open to splitting the bill. But those first couple of dates are the time for me to be courted a little.”

But this line of who asks who gets a little blurry in the modern age of online dating. Or if the people already know each other and at least one of them isn’t sure whether they’re going out on a date or something more casual.

A possible solution to the tricky situation could be “the reach”. Patricia Garcia wrote, “More than half of the staff [at VOGUE] agreed, you should always reach inside your bag once the check arrives—even if you don’t intend to pay.”

“You do the fiddling, the shuffling, and give them enough time to reach for their own wallets to take care of the bill,” one of the magazine’s editors said. “Or else what’s the option? Just sitting there and staring at them, waiting? No, that’s too awkward.”