#1 "The boiling water I'm cooking."
I'd just say "the water I'm boiling" but what do I know...

#35 Doing that makes the bill non circulatable since it will no longer fit in counting machines, vending machines or ATMs. FYI- it's a federal crime to "mutilate, cut, deface, disfigure, or perforate, or unite or cement together" any form of U.S. currency, and it's punishable by hefty fines and/or six months imprisonment. So if you're looking to be funny, maybe don't post it on social media.

#40 for all you squares out there- DP= double penetration

#2 ..or you get smashed by the elephant dildo

#26 gotta love how there’s a random gun sitting there that no one noticed….