most of these are solvable. like the shoes? take a pair. those looks expensive. The pergola? take a reciprocating saw to it or just repaint your ends. the mustang? potatoes. the bad parking? cheese slices.

#7 It will take a little effort, Do a variation of a home alone trick, hang it from the ceiling and attach a string to the doorhandles and some pointy things on the door, when they open the door it releases the bag that swings down and into the pointy things it will burst the bag and the sh#t will make a mess in their apartment.

#14 If it's a Cul-de-sac and not blocking a driveway that is how you park. It allows everyone to park in the limited space.

#18 Accidentally spill a gallon of paint...
#23 discharging a deadly weapon, let the police deal with them.
#26 Got any livestock? If the dog attacks livestock you're within your rights to shoot the unleashed animal.

Neighborly behavior and general kindness is racist.

I just want my 10 acres with a clearing in the middle for a small house. That way I don't have to deal with neighbors and if I do, plenty of space to dispose of the remains.

#21 Yeah, our neighbor came over at 3 am when we had a newborn baby, and smashed our door cam with a rock because we parked in the street and he wanted the spot (we parked at 8pm at night and he got off work at 2 am).