"Okay, so a quick disclaimer first - this wasn't me, but my friend Dolly who was a flight attendant for a well known British airline until she died. She'd been with them since year dot, and as a result of her seniority would work in the First Class cabin. In her own words, she preferred it at the front of the plane, the nylon carpets at the back played havoc with her bunions..

ANYWAY,

One day she had a British "celebrity" called Katie Price onboard. Ms Price is famous for... umm.. having boobs and falling out of various bars, I think.

So, Ms Price comes on board, spots Dolly, and proceeds to spend five minutes listing her demands for the flight - namely that she should have total privacy, that anyone coming near her should be escorted away, that no crew approach her unless she calls them, and that Dolly herself would be held responsible if she was bothered at all, heads would roll, etc..

Dolly waited for her to finish her demands, and then said "Certainly madam. And you are.......?""