Matthew Carroll started to note all of the funny things his toddler daughter was saying. He found them really amusing and five years later there were enough of such sayings to put together a book. He called it "Can I Sit On Your Lap While You're Pooping?" Here are some of the funny bits:

A guy who’s living with three dogs woke up to find feathers in the hall way. It seemed suspicious to him so he followed the traces of crime left by one of his dogs. Here’s where they lead him…

These school photos are both embarrassing and awesome.