Isn’t murder already illegal? Well, apparently, murder with a bulletproof vest is even more illegal. Only a really, really bad guy would do something like that.

Four and a half hours of bingo? You’re fine. 5 hours? You better lawyer up.

We’re not exactly sure why this law made sense to anybody ever, but maybe North Dakota pretzels are just too good to be spoiled by intoxication.

There are only 11 months available for rabbit picture taking in this state. During the twelfth month, you better give the poor rabbits a break.

But seriously…who even does that? 50 pounds? Of candy? That deserves to be illegal.

Apparently, in some places, Christmas can come early, but it had better not stay late, at least not later than mid January.

Well, it’s understandably dangerous, but come on, if someone is cool enough to walk across the street on their hands, why would you punish them?

That’s right, could you please refrain from dying until you have exited the building? This will at least prevent your family from being subject to litigation.

Our guess is that there are a lot of law breakers in this country…

Imagine going your whole life thinking that your wife is taking perfect care of her teeth only to find out that…they’re fake! It’s a horrifying thought, at least horrifying enough to make them sign permission slips.

Springs, balls flying around like crazy, bright lights and loud noises, you need to be a responsible adult to handle this craziness; at least that’s what South Carolina would say.

Salt plus railroad tracks plus Alabama equals death. Got it.

This city strives for authenticity maybe a little too hard!

Forget “strictly forbidden,” how about “strictly-that’s-the-dumbest-idea-anybody-could-ever-come-up-with.” Needless to say, nobody has ever been prosecuted for breaking this law.

If someone is going over 65 mph on a bike, well, that is pretty fast…what the heck, pull them over.

Wisconsin, the land of milk, cows, and real butter…even in their jails.

While it’s hard to imagine a situation that would require you to sit on a giraffe’s neck with a fishing pole, if you do ever find yourself  in this position, just make sure you are not in Illinois.

Forget real bullets, Super Soakers are just as bad. Who wants to go into work and get drenched by masked robbers? Way to go, Louisiana.

You can share whatever you want with your neighbors, just make sure it’s not a vacuum cleaner. In this case, the legal thing to do is ask the people across the street.

It’s understandable really. Why would any state want its citizens leaving its borders with ducks on top of their heads? It just makes everybody look bad.

Does anybody follow rules in Las Vegas? Wait…are there even rules in Las Vegas? Apparently, there’s at least one.

Nebraska…you have our sincerest apologies from the bottom of our sorrow filled hearts. May your laws one day change and allow the sun to shine into your lives.

You know those times when you’re just looking for a place to spend the night and all of sudden you see a refrigerator hanging out by itself, and you think “Man that looks comfortable to sleep on!”? Yea, neither do we. Pennsylvania…you’re strange.

If someone can whistle underwater, they can probably do some other pretty crazy stuff, too, like run through walls, fly around super fast, and just generally be awesome at breaking the laws of physics. Word of caution to law enforcement in Vermont…let them whistle underwater.