“A client called us yelling that we sold her a broken screen because, ‘the numbers wouldn’t go away.’ We sent help.”
“I was cleaning out old food from our cabinets today and found my wife’s secret Oreo stash.”
If there is a man with a beard in your house, your sink will look like this pretty often.
“300 miles away from my wife and I’m still finding her hairpins! Anyone else get this.”
“Y’all wanna get upset by the lack of seasoning on my boyfriend’s chicken?”
When she doesn’t care which bowl is for what:
“One of these is wrong. EVERY MORNING! Men.”
“Never, hear me, never ask your boyfriend for clothing advice.”
“Hey Babe, can you build ’us’ some shoe shelves?”
“How is it even possible to lose 9 socks? Where do they even go?”
“The way my wife ‘disposes’ of eggshells”
“I can’t decide if this deserves an A for effort... Or a D for effort. At least he tried-ish?”
Well, he is right.
“I asked my husband to make baked potatoes for dinner... This is what I got.”
“My girlfriend always steals my socks. And they are never matching...”
“I asked Scott to unpack the toilet paper... Instead of the cute 10-roll pyramid I usually make, I got this masterpiece boobytrap just waiting to come crashing down on my head.”
“My wife is a monster.”
“My husband was unloading groceries the other day & asked if the chicken could go in the freezer. I said yes just separate it into Ziplocs (it’s easier to thaw the exact amount we need for a meal). Just looked in the freezer this morning & both packages are like this... ah, the male brain...”
“When you come home late from work and your husband announces that he might have had a little accident while making dinner...”
“Asked my brother to leave some lemon for me.”
“Out of all the marriage advice I got, nothing prepared me for this.”
“My boyfriend left just enough noodles in the box to make saving them pointless.”
“I had a fever yesterday and my boyfriend thought it was a pregnancy test.”
