"Close To Midnight Five Years Ago, I Was Startled By The Pathetic Mewling Of An Unhappy Kitty"
"My husband and I went all over our house, opening cabinet and closet doors in an attempt to free whichever kitty of ours had managed to trap his or herself. According to the vet, kitty was malnourished and suffering from ringworm on her ears. She was so young that she still had her milk teeth. In order to treat the ringworm, we had to massage an ointment all over her ears AND let it set for 15 minutes before washing it off. All without her messing with it. This is when I learned she was so freaking tiny that I could plop her entire body into a Crown Royal bag, gently draw the string just over her shoulders, treat her ears, and keep her safe, snug, and still until it was time to wash off the goo and let her free. Five years, and a lot of love later, her fur grew back and she fluffed up, though she's still rather diminutive for a full grown cat. Today, Not My Cat is now my beloved MoonShine."
If you are not a cat person, get a dog.
<-- Doggo get rid of cat.
Dog or cat. Both are great.