"She said get pads with wings... now she’s mad"
"My wife scrapes off the cream and only eats the cookie from her Oreo"
"My husband added swiss cheese to the pizza..... considering divorce right now"
"My wife gave me bathbomb for Valentines called LUNA. Pretty sure they should have called it WATERBIRTH"
"My husband got a free ergonomic chair, the downside being peach color fabric. He got black covers to go on it and accidentally gave himself perma plumbers crack"
"The duality of my wife's hospitality"
"Making tea for my wife and I in the dark. Grabbed two tea bag’s that I thought were the same. Not sure sure who got which tea. Will report which one of us pooped the bed and who slept through it."
"Made my husband the Eddie Murphy Sonic the Hedgehog SNL cake for his birthday. Thrilled with how hilariously awful it turned out"
"The way my husband opened the cheese"
"Turns out I married a psychopath"
"My husband's version of "the kitchen is clean"."
"My wife is a psychopath"
"My husband likes to play jenga in the fridge"
"This husband, who thought tying a dog poop bag to his luggage to help identify it was a good idea:"
"I think I married a sociopath"