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Philadelphia 2 month s ago
My friend came into the bar, all confused and worked up, so I asked him if he'd like a drink. Usually he drinks either vodka-orange juice or vieux-cola. He was so out of it that he asked for a vodka-vieux

(vieux is a dutch drink)
       
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yahooshoot

"I was on a long train trip, gazing out the window, when I said to my friend: “I feel like every railroad crossing gate we’ve passed since I’ve been looking has been down… what are the odds…”

I have a PhD (not in trains)."

 

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Facepalm Quotes: Capturing The Epitome Of Dumbness In Speech
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