"I Have No Idea What I Did But She Really Hated It"
"Muenster Screams At The Door To Go Outside. I Try Telling Him It’s Cold. He Was Displeased To Find Out That It Is, In Fact, Cold"
"My Husband Poured Himself A Glass Of Water"
"I Walked Into My Friends House"
"I Told Her That She Got Fat"
"I Kissed Her During iPad Time"
"The Downstairs Neighbor Sneezed"
"Claudia Taking A Reluctant Flight To Sleepy Town"
"I Told Her That Her Sister Is Allowed To Exist Too"
"My Wife And I Put Our Wedding Rings On Each Ear. He Seemed To Have Felt Violated"
"I Meowed Back"
"We Made The Mistake Of Getting Her A Baby Brother…"
"He Was Laying On My Gfs Chest And I Made Her Laugh"
"I Brutally Torture My Cat (I Kissed His Forehead)"
"I Told Her It Wasn't Dinner Time Just Because It's Dark Outside"
"She Mad Because Nobody Is Taking Her Order"
"I Told Him He Couldn’t Eat My Daffodils Because They’re Toxic To Cats"
"I Accidentally Coughed Near Her"
"I Touched “My Boyfriend “ He Didn’t Like That!"
"I Told Her To Stop Crushing My Organs :("
"I Tried To Comfort Her When The Dryer Went Off"
"Somebody Got M***ered Outside Our Apartment"
"He Finished His Fish Slop In A Tube"
"I Did Not Mean To Turn On The Flash"