And here are just a few of the reasons why!
This is your life...
A purgatory where red lights actually last forever
And you're always waiting for the subway...
or the bus...
or the ferry
Only to have this happen
It's a place where no one seems to understand public tranportation etiquette
And this is the only open seat
Because some people need extra room for their tail
Or their bike
Others confuse the bus for a mobile couch
...or the train for a bed
There's always pole hogs
Butt Straddlers
Boob straddlers
Aisle seat snobs
Leg stretchers
Woman chopping onions
People think the floor is for gross food scraps...
Or vomit
Creeps smile at you for unknown reasons
Seriously don't smile. No one is happy
And don't fuckin' sing!
Or preach about religion!
Or try to sell your mixtape!
Oh btw, the escalator never works
Even the subway lines are reminding you how much this sucks
Sometimes mother nature intervenes
Which causes overcrowding on the train
Or "track switch problems"
Train advisories start looking like this
Which causes overcrowding on the bus
Where you miss your stop because of this asshat
So you decide to drive?
Enjoy merging lanes...
And the 18-wheelers...
Not to mention mindnumbing gridlock
Where people like to check their e-mail...
Play musical instruments...
Rubberneck...
Or, you know, do other stuff
Then your iPod breaks
But you pass a sign that gives you false hope
And you laugh that your odometer says "Boobs"
And then you get a flat
So now you're biking to work
And this happens
Forcing you back here
With this guy
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