Doorknobs – Beware of these bacteria magnets, especially the ones in public bathrooms.
Vending Machine Buttons – No, this isn’t an excuse to rock the machine back and forth to see if a snack falls out.
Parking Meters – At least getting that ticket seems somewhat like a positve now.
Crosswalk Buttons – Looking both ways won’t save you here.
ATM – Maybe being completely broke isn’t so bad after all.
TV Remotes – What do you expect from something that spends so much time underneath the couch?
Toilet Seats – No surprise there.
Cell Phones – How are these dirtier than toilet seats? I’ve only dropped mine in there like ten times.
Inside Latches of Public Bathroom Stalls – Think of it as one last reminder to wash your hands.
Light Switches – Who would think to clean these things?
Microwave Pads – As if eating pizza for breakfast wasn’t already bad enough for you.
Elevator Buttons – Just what we needed, another excuse for jerks to not hold the door for us.
Mailbox Handles – All of those bills really might be the death of you.
Supermarket Self-Checkout Registers – Where food and money germs meet. Yikes!
Money – Um, I think I’ll take my chances with this one.
Gas Pump Handles – Another one of those things that everyone touches, but doesn’t think to clean their hands after using.
Escalator Rails – Are you seeing this, Mom? I was right for not wanting to use these.
Computer Keyboards – With a browser history like yours, this seems fitting.
Kitchen Sinks – This list seems like it has everything but the kitchen sink on it, until now.
Shopping Carts – More incentive to spend less at the supermarket.
Drinking Fountains – That helps explain why people are willing to spend so much on bottled water.
Playground Equipment – Take note, adult weirdos.
Bathtubs – Really? Even if you don’t occasionally use it as a toilet just to switch things up?
Refrigerator Handles – The same people touching the refrigerator handle are also those who you’d find handling uncooked meat.
Human Mouths – Yep, your mouth is gross too. You disgust me.
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