“So my mom told me this story about how my aunt and uncle ran into a celebrity at a bar and became friends with him, and she couldn’t remember his name. My aunt just sent me these pictures...”
“Reminder that one year my little brother wore a bike helmet to his final exams so he could ’slam his head on his desk but, like, safely.’”
“My parents showed up at my party and I was passed out drunk. I didn’t think that this was how they would react.”
Like mother, like son
“My mother becomes an evil genius when it comes to punishing me.”
“I bought an inflatable suit with my mom’s card without telling her and she kinda got mad, but it was worth it.”
Depressed, but has money
“My barely 5 ft tall grandfather wanted me to show ‘those people on your phone’ his zucchini... But first, he needed sunglasses so that he looks cool for the internet. Also, the last picture of him is what he will do to people who say his zucchini is ugly.”
This got us thinking.
When your dad tries to clean up your daughter’s Girls World with alcohol, but it completely takes the eyes out, so he sticks some on from a magazine:
“Every morning there is a line to the toilet. Today, I got up early to go before everyone else and saw this.”
“My brother and dad drove separately to our family dinner and here’s what happened. Now, they are arguing over who has to go home and change clothes.”
“Here’s a quick story of my niece trying to get the bulldog off of her seat.”
This is where Captain America’s smile comes from.
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Guess who will be the loudest b*tch crying about people who don't respect her...