“My husband doesn’t want the case to get scratched because it’ll make him nervous.”
“My brother sets a new alarm every night.”
“How my girlfriend opens the bread”
“My dad likes to take a small bite out of all the cookies and then put them back.”
“How my girlfriend watches TV”
“This is how my mom puts the knives away in the drying rack.”
“My girlfriend doesn’t eat the ends of her fries.”
Some people eat only fish and ignore the rest of the sushi ingredients.
“How my dad puts away the silverware”
“This is how my fiancée ate her pizza when we visited Naples. It happened the day after we got engaged. Should I call it off?”
“My friend’s desktop background”
“This is my family.”
“I found this in my kitchen and I guess I’m divorcing my wife.”
“My boss is physically incapable of pointing at the screen without touching it.”
“My girlfriend refuses to eat the ’crust’ off a pancake.”
“My dad watches TV with the menu up.”
“How my girlfriend used our stick of butter”
“My dad has had this laptop for 4 years and he’s still refusing to take the plastic protector off.”
