Convince people the iPhone was worth the money by showing them that one app where it looks like you're drinking a beer:
And that one app where it looked like you had a lighter:
Argue passionately over whether pirates could beat ninjas in a fight:
Just post the most insane shit on Facebook:
Think Chuck Norris jokes were the be-all and end-all of comedy:
Think that typing like this meant you were creative:
Talk about Michael Phelps's diet like six times a day:
Take pictures with that one awful Photo Booth filter:
Own that one white MacBook that got dirty after like a week:
Take weird pictures of your feet or hands because you all had matching bracelets or shoes:
Harass everyone on Facebook with like 14 "LOST PHONE, NEED NUMBERS" groups:
And like 17 FarmVille requests:
Insist that BlackBerry was way better than iPhone because of Brick Breaker and BBM:
Watch full-length movies that cost tens of millions of dollars to make on an iPod with a 2-inch screen:
Change your age to 99 years old on Myspace:
Fake people out with your voicemail message:
Text incognito with your phone in your pocket:
Watch movies on portable DVD players, god rest their soul:
Constantly quote that one Bill O'Reilly video where he swears:
Celebrate National Talk Like a Pirate Day:
Take selfies with a big-a$$ digital camera:
Take dramatic photos of Converse:
And take pictures doing this exact pose:
Carry both an iPod and a cellphone AT THE SAME DAMN TIME:
Upload 400 pictures to Facebook at once in an album with a title from a Dave Matthews Band song:
Get obsessed with Doppelgänger Week on Facebook:
Have an opinion about a man named Don Vito:
Spend money on ringback tones. Sweet, sweet ringback tones:
And listen to the Black Eyed Peas:
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2nd Place: That satisfying sound of America On-Line's: "You Got Mail"
3rd: Yelling Across Your Home; "I'm Getting On The Computer, Don't Pick Up The Phone!" (Because of Dial-Up).
The Frozen Monkey has spoken.