“I grabbed my banana instead of the conductor’s baton on the music stand as I began conducting the orchestra and chorus during a rehearsal. The musicians followed the banana very well.”
“I was studying my notes which were in a notebook while also following lecture slides on my iPad. I tried zooming in my notes. Happened many more times throughout the sem.”
“I cracked an egg, poured out the egg into the trash and put the shell into a bowl.”
“Eating sandwich at beach. Skipping stones. Watching the sunset and thinking about life. Throw sandwich into ocean. Bite rock. People saw.”
“I went to go and put a scoop of cat food in the washing machine drawer once.”
“Threw a glass of water on my bed instead of a book.”
“I was writing while drinking coke. I ended up stabbing myself in the face with a pencil.”
“I had a cup of coffee and a little single-serve container of coffee cream. I opened the cream container, poured its contents into the trash, and then dropped the empty container into my coffee.”
“Friend of mine once put the remote control in the oven and then wondered why he found himself in the living room holding a sausage. Remote control was destroyed. And it had previously spent several days in the back of a freezer because of a similar incident.”
“I have put the house phone in the fridge and left the milk out more times than is healthy. The fridge is now the default first place I look if the phone is not on its cradle.”
“Stuck a dog treat in my mouth and gave my dog my popsicle. She was thrilled.”
“When I was 10, I was watching TV and had the remote in one hand and a cup of hot tea in the other. My dad came in and asked for the remote, instead of tossing him the remote I threw my cup of tea and it when all over him. The next morning his chest and legs were red.”
“Threw away five bucks, tried to pay at cash register with candy rappers.”
“Put a wad of tissues in the laundry basket and threw my socks into the toilet.”
“Drank paint water and whilst washing my brush in my cup of tea. Two simultaneous f@#kups.”
“My husband cleans the cat litterbox and puts the gleanings in a tied off plastic grocery bag. He also puts his lunch in a tied off plastic grocery bag. When he goes to work he takes both bags outside, one to come with him and one for the trash can. Mistakes have happened.”
“This was my brother, but I was on the receiving end. We were at a country club for a wedding one evening and there were various backgammon games set up. This happened so long ago I don’t even remember how to play backgammon anymore. But it was my brother’s turn and he was excited. So excited he slammed his glass of bourbon down on the game board and thrust the dice cup full of dice into his mouth. Totally worth being covered in watered down liquor to witness such buffoonery.”
“I dipped my chips in the water, had a little “I’m such a dumba$$” moment in my head, then proceeded to drink the salsa.”
“A couple minutes ago I unwrapped a stick of gum, stuck the wrapper in my mouth, and threw the gum in the trash.”
“Was drinking a hot cup of coffee on the back porch while throwing a ball for my dog…To be fair it was like 4am and the pup wasn’t hurt, but my favorite mug got rearranged and the tree got some dirty bean water….”
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