DECEMBER 4: NATIONAL COOKIE DAY
Oatmeal chocolate chip cookies. Give them a shot.
DECEMBER 5: BATHTUB PARTY DAY
DECEMBER 5: INTERNATIONAL NINJA DAY
My 8 year-old self is STOKED.
DECEMBER 6: NATIONAL PAWNBROKERS DAY
Pawn something you’ll immediately regret this day.
DECEMBER 9: WEARY WILLIE DAY
He’s that sad hobo clown you might have seen. Fun for all ages!
DECEMBER 11: OFFICIAL LOST AND FOUND DAY
So, no finders, keepers?
DECEMBER 12: POINSETTIA DAY
DECEMBER 12: GINGERBREAD DECORATING DAY
Make some art and eat it, too.
DECEMBER 13: NATIONAL DAY OF THE HORSE
DECEMBER 13: NATIONAL COCOA DAY
DECEMBER 14: MONKEY DAY
DECEMBER 15: CAT HERDERS DAY
This could be for people that just have to wrangle a bunch of employees, or, just literal cat herders. Party on!
DECEMBER 16: BARBIE AND BARNEY BACKLASH DAY
Tell ‘em to go to Hell.
DECEMBER 17: WRIGHT BROTHERS DAY
Tell ‘em to fly to Hell. Respectfully.
DECEMBER 18: UNDERDOG DAY
DECEMBER 21: HUMBUG DAY
Get your Scrooge on. Bah!
DECEMBER 21: PHILEAS FOGG WIN A WAGER DAY
I have no idea, but this has something to do with gambling so…IN.
DECEMBER 22: FOREFATHERS’ DAY
Thanks, fam. We would not be here without you.
DECEMBER 23: FESTIVUS!
Airing of grievances is going to take a long time this year.
DECEMBER 26: NATIONAL WHINERS DAY
But I don’t want to celebrate this holiday.
DECEMBER 29: TICK TOCK DAY
Better get on those resolutions, because the clock is ticking! Only one day left in the year.
DECEMBER 31: MAKE UP YOUR MIND DAY
Better yet, just make a firm decision to roll it over to next year. Then you’ll have plenty of time to get it done.