“Someone came for an interview at my work the other day and casually drove off without their shoes.”
“I legit thought I’d cycled past a zebra till I stopped to look back for a double-take.”
“I bought 6 donuts. She ate her 2 immediately. After telling her she couldn’t have my last donut, she grabbed the box and did this.”
“My number for the country’s final exams was 11412. I signed up for the local coast guard this week and my number is 11412.”
“It’s ’70s day, and this kid is dressing for the 1770s.”
“’Breakfast in bed’ was taken quite literally.”
“Mozzarella sticks with no mozzarella”
“A classroom at my university has a tree growing inside of it.”
“I had an uncut Cheez-It cracker.”
“There was a leak in my office lobby after yesterday’s thunderstorm — took me a moment to realize the purpose.”
“I missed my exit for Spooky Town and I’m now in Horror-ville.”
“Noticed a small crack in my plate halfway into dinner.”
“The day my son tried to turn himself into the Incredible Hulk”
“I don’t think that means what you think it means.”
“My mother was about to make a pie — she was 5 minutes away and...”
“My little brother just returned from trick-or-treating...”
“Yep, that about checks out.”
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Not proud to say I did something like that when I was little. My hands were grass green for days, had no good excuse then and still don't...