"Canada here. Please don't litter in our wildlife preserves. Please."
"Don't talk so damn much. Don't sit next to us. Keep at least one meter of personal space. Don't tip. Don't haggle. Shut up. Drink more.
Finland, in case you were wondering."
"Don't just walk up to a kangaroo and pat it in the wild. Those [email protected]#kers will kick the sh#t out of you. I'm looking at you Japanese"
Wearing khakis And hiking boots screams tourist. It makes you a target for criminals and that sweet camera you bought for your trip is going to find a new home. And besides, if your trip is going to involve hiking of any kind S&R would prefer you wore bright clothes so it makes your @$$ easier to find if you get lost.
If you are going on a game drive (no one here calls it a safari) keep your doors locked and windows rolled up. Otherwise, enjoy being Simbas lunch. Respect the wildlife, they are wild animals and have no qualms about making you unalive."
"In America, don't get out of your car and approach the cop when being stopped by a cop unless told to."
"Britain - Do not antagonise the Queen's Guard. They are well within their rights to lay hands on you if you provoke them."
"Iceland: Just because you watched Top Gear, don't think you can drive all over nature. Actually, this probably applies to most countries Top Gear has visited."
"Australia: Don't go to our beaches without first applying sunscreen. Wear clothes and POLARISED sunglasses. We have the highest rate of skin cancer in the world due to extreme UV during summer. Also don't go swimming in your clothes at a beach, you'll drown."
"Quebec here, well Canada. Don't buy maple syrup from the first stall you see, it will be way overpriced. Just go to a grocery store you'll do great economy"
"America: Plan too much. If you wanna see the Statue of Liberty, the Smithsonian, the Alamo, and the Grand Canyon, you're going to spend all of your time driving. Pick a specific area, and do everything you can in there."
"Go on a hike unarmed when visiting the Svalbard archipelago here in Norway. You are required to aways have a firearm with you to protect against polar bears when traveling outside the populated areas."
"UK: Don't ever - ever - criticise the BBC or the NHS.
It's ours; we can complain all we like because we pay for it. And we like to complain too.
It's our unofficial national sport.You are merely a guest - if you ever need to use the BBC or NHS, you do not get to complain about it!"
Don't [email protected]#king walk out of the bus without looking both ways. There is an actual bike path between the pavement and the road at almost all bus stops. This means that if you just walk out of the bus once you reach your stop, you will get hit by a person on a steel contraption, moving at a very dangerous speed. It can get bloody, expensive and very embarrassing. This same thing applies when you need to get onto a bus. Don't just walk up to it and hop it: Look both ways before you cross the bike path"
"UK: Don't sit at a table in the pub and wait for someone to come and take your order.
Reason why? They won't."
Please don't say we are like Germans in any way. We do not sound like them, we do not look like them, in fact, just don't mention anything German.
Also; Don't walk in the bicycle lane, don't feed the doves and don't be a cool with the weed. Yeah it's fine to smoke in public but don't do it in crowded places or when kids are around."