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Maybe it's time to shave your neck beard,remove the cheap fedora, quit calling your mom M'Lady and move out of Mom and Dad's house.
#6 Because, someone wants you to quit lying about your d@#k.
#7 Really? Have you seen cars from the late '50s and early 60's? Talk about abomination.
#11 Ah, yes. Nothing like standing on a piss-wet floor next to someone, wondering how much of their piss is splashing on your suit. Sit down and piss, stop doing disgusting shit.
#16 Oh you 're so proud of your wife for handling a video game controller. She'll never be able to handle it as well as you handle it, or as well as you handle your penis, for that matter. You spend so much time handling both. So sad, she's usually not interested in either.
#23 At last, something funny.
#25 Right. What are you going to take pictures of? All that stupid equipment you bought so you can lie to people about your mountain climbing last weekend? When what you did was walk for 20 minutes down a trail, ate a sandwich with a side of twinkies and peed?
#26 Now, that's an idea!
#29 It's YOUR kid. They learned from a master. I work with you, remember?
#38 Dumbest house decor since shag carpets.
#50 If you have to add "lol" to your own joke... it's not funny. I don't care what you said.
#50 I know, right? Or, when people write "sarc" when they don't know how to write sarcastically. And even THEN you're like, "Huh??? This isn't even remotely sarcastic."