“A hippo swam directly to me and stared at me in the zoo.”
“My wife’s cat whisker collection.”
“Coworker made an ornament from our husky’s shed hair.”
“My local Chinese restaurant is giving out Wall Scrolls for the holidays.”
“The visual representation of wearing glasses with different lens strengths.”
“This claw machine where you can win cans of soup.”
"This gorgeous cat has two different colour eyes."
“At my local grocery store, the condoms are next to the baby food.”
“My coffee spill looks like the Americas”
“I ran over – and shattered – this frozen banana peel”
“Found a log that resembles a boot”
“My antidepressant had a smiley face on it.”
“My hotel has real apples to take at every floor.”
“Turtle stack I saw in the park.”
“My mayonnaise expiration date says the word mayo in it”
“There were 4 lobsters in this tank and they each took a corner in a pseudo Mexican standoff looking way”
“A banana the size of my forearm”
“I found a pearl in my dinner last night (it was a chocolate clam)”
“My golden retriever’s nose slowly turns pink in the winter.”
“I can make a fist around my pinky.”
“Moss on this sign only grows on the black letters and lines.”
“My dogs nose texture”
“The ‘American Selection’ at this supermarket in Ireland”
“I saw this spiders web during my walk.”
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That is the statement of a hapless, deluded buffoon.
how is your healthcare better?
I agree in one point: Your billionaires are really richer than ours
Land of the greed, home of the slaves
“I ain’t fallin’ for no banana in my tailpipe!” - Eddie Murphy
Someone stole all my antidepressants. I hope they're happy now.
It's too late by the baby food stage.
Or right next to the diapers