“Don’t bother dad while he’s eating.”
“No Monopoly allowed. We tried it for a few family game nights. It never ended well. My wife donated all Monopoly versions.”
“When there are multiple dessert options after a large family meal, the lime jelly must be included in the options offered to everyone, but nobody may accept the lime jelly. Only my stepdad may have the lime jelly.”
“When a guest leaves you need to walk out to their car with them no matter what the weather. We were taught it’s a sign of care and respect for the guests.”
“If you are the last person to leave the house you need to put the radio on for the cat.”
“We’re all incredibly sarcastic and kinda rude to each other. It’s how we show love but to avoid any actual hurt feelings if anyone ever says the exact phrase ‘stop teasing’ it’s over and everyone apologizes. Grew up with this rule and trust me kindergarten was a rough awakening when bullies don’t bend over backwards at my magic phrase.”
“You know how most people worship cats? We do that, but for ducks.”
“There is a framed photo of the girl which came with the frame among our other family photos on the cabinet. My grandpa received the frame and he died before he’d exchanged the photo so we’re just keeping it like that.”
“Youngest person that knows how to read hands out the Christmas presents.”
“The last slice of birthday cake belongs to the person whose birthday it was made to celebrate. Not strange in and of itself, strange in that my family had to actively spell it out.”
“No one tells mom that my sister and I didn’t buy our graduation photos and just framed the sample photo with the huge watermark. Been four years and she hasn’t noticed.”
“No one takes the last portion of anything, you just take half and it gets progressively smaller like Zeno’s Paradox.”
“No sweeping or mopping at night. Mom & dad claim its bad luck but I know it’s cuz they’re tired of us quickly doing our chores as they pull up in the driveway.”
“We have a “First Day” rule. You are not allowed to ask to play with or use any toys/items of your siblings on the first day they receive them. So birthdays and holidays that you get presents, you do not have to share with the others. And if they try, you get to yell “First Day!”
“If ever giving someone a ride home, wait for them to get the door to their house open before leaving. This may have been more important when I was growing up before everyone had a cellphone. My parents did a lot with our church youth group so there were a lot of events or times after get-togethers where some of them would need rides, and this was to make sure they were home safely and not locked out or anything.”
“If you find the gnome, you hide the gnome.”
“My family always has 2 dogs, you may insult the younger dog as much as you want, but you must never insult the elder dog.”
“We do not fight at weddings.”
“Most of the shows we watch are recorded live, and then watched later in the week. Mother cannot control the remote, as she will skip the commercials and go 5 minutes further, then spend just as long getting back to the correct stop as it would have been to watch the commercials in the first place.”
“When eating a meal together, we have a certain sitting arrangement. But when drinking a coffee, me and my mum switch seats. Same table, different arrangement.”
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It got to the point where one of us would 'accidentally' knock something over so that he'd leave and we could eat our dinner in peace.
#10 - Intro to cannibalism ?