“The sunlight through the window melted my keyboard.”
“I threw my swatter at a fly. Don’t ask questions because I don’t have answers.”
“My cat decided to wake me up with a little gift. He just dropped a flower pot.”
“I spilled cocoa powder on the floor and vacuumed it up before it exploded out of the collection bin and onto my chair and table.”
“A lizard fell from the ceiling and left this dusty imprint on my wireless charger.”
“I woke up and saw my door was removed by my parents. I asked them why and they replied, ’Privacy isn’t necessary.’”
“This bird scarer was definitely a worthless purchase.”
“My mother-in-law left a magnifying mirror near the window on a sunny day. This is what happened.”
“I’m starting to think this view isn’t worth golfers aiming directly at our home.”
“I went to the gas station last night for 5 minutes to buy some stuff and came back to this. My room is the window to the right.”
“My fridge has an egg case for only 9 eggs.”
“The painting crew said they’d put everything back and we have nothing to worry about when we went to move the furniture back.”
“An hour after, they leave and we discover this.”
“My oven door shattering spontaneously”
“Tonight, the cabinet hanging on the wall neatly missed my head.”
“I started my toddler’s bath, got him undressed, and came back to this.”
“My nextdoor neighbors painted their house yellow. It reflects sunlight, so my room now looks like this.”
“So, I set my kitchen on fire last night…”
“In one week, I have: gotten a flat tire, gotten into an accident, found out my car needs $1500 repairs that I can’t afford, and just opened my laptop to find a shattered screen.”
“I feel like I’m too old to keep learning life lessons, yet here we are.”
“The handle just broke off my brand new cast iron skillet. I haven’t even cooked anything with it yet”
“RIP to my Gameboy Advance. I pulled it outta my pocket after work and its screen was ruined like this.”
Most of these people are idiots.
#1
If the sun shining through a window caused that, would thousands of houses not burn down every hot sunny day?
#3
If a pot fell through a toilet, why is the dirt and floor dry?
#50 Did you happen to word it “Can I order one pepperoni pizza please?”
Sucks tho, other than that it looks like a dang good pie! Dibs on those two slices!!
bonus if you're a girl