“Washer vibrated it’s way behind the door.”
“New neighbors moved in in front of us. They keep these lights on all the time. This is our bedroom windows and the view from our bed at 2am.”
“Can’t go out to the plans I made tonight because the maintenance guy changed my locks but half assed it.”
“Our first year where we thought we could afford the electric bill to put out some Christmas lights and by the second week somebody decided to cut our lights. Why??!??”
“So glad Delta gave me the option of paying extra to select a window seat.”
“Emptied out my savings to have my laptop screen fixed before finals. 1 week later and now it stops working during finals week – I just don’t know what to do anymore.”
“My 2 week old septic tank floated from the first big rain”
“Had big plans for dinner tonight. Little guy must’ve liked bacon grease and onions…”
“I’m in my mid 30s and unfortunately still sleepwalk occasionally. Took a sleepwalking tumble down the stairs last night…”
“Does this make my cat an abstract expressionist?”
“Just rented an RV for the weekend, forgot to take off the glass when cooking”
“Silence is golden. But when you have kids, silence is suspicious.”
“Before and after I got my wisdom teeth removed”
“AirPods went missing...turns out my kid buried them in the backyard.”
“’Children’s horseplay’ — found that at my grocery store.”
“Help! My kid destroyed my monstera and ripped all of the leaves off.”
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#19 kid probably thought they were bellsprout seeds and wanted to grow some pokemon.
It makes your cat adoptable.