"I can tell you really tried your best."
"With just a little more effort, you can make it to the top of the bell curve. I’m sure of it."
"Anything a 5-year-old says to me."
"You are very difficult to underestimate."
"Snatching defeat from the jaws of victory yet again, eh?"
"An old Chinese curse: “May the worst day of your past be the best day of your future.”"
"It’s a good thing you’re pretty."'
"You have delusions of adequacy."
"Have the day you deserve :)"
"I told a 6 year old that I was so fat because that’s where I hid all of my secrets. She looked me dead in the face and told me I needed fewer secrets. I now have 80 fewer."
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The best: "American Dad." Season 7, episode 10. Steve Smith to ostensible comedian, Dane Cook. The very last scene: "I don't care what every single person on earth says...you're hilarious!"