“I always get a double-take from customs because my passport is only 4 months old.”
’’When you find out yarn weight and needle size matter in a pattern’’
’’Yeah, you and me both — no wonder I love this pizza!’’
’’I made a new art piece today. I call it Cutting Board in the Dishwasher."
’’The face I made on my first real rollercoaster ride’’
’’Expectation vs reality’’
’’Seventh grade me vs 2022 me — it wasn’t a phase, Mom.’’
’’I wanted to look beautiful but instead, I look like a creepy guy from a Halloween movie.’’
’’If you think you look ugly in a document, check mine out."
"My advice is: Never become a blonde!"
"Leonardo DiCaprio made a joke at the American Movie Awards ceremony. He said, "Do you engrave Oscars every year? How would I know?""
"This was in my dentist's waiting room."
"My boss and I had an ugly sweater competition."
"So my friend went to the DMV on Halloween..."
"New workout plan."
"When there is nothing to talk about"
"Job search"
"It happened. I'm a Disney princess now!"
"Rice bear under cheese blanket, or...an alien?"
“When you look more like Harry Potter than Harry Potter!”
So have you talked to your psychiatrist about your tattoo fixation yet?
Comes with fortune cookie!
you got that two times?
better believe it
#56
so thats the 500$ stand