“I always get a double-take from customs because my passport is only 4 months old.”
’’When you find out yarn weight and needle size matter in a pattern’’
’’Yeah, you and me both — no wonder I love this pizza!’’
’’I made a new art piece today. I call it Cutting Board in the Dishwasher."
’’The face I made on my first real rollercoaster ride’’
’’Expectation vs reality’’
’’Seventh grade me vs 2022 me — it wasn’t a phase, Mom.’’
’’I wanted to look beautiful but instead, I look like a creepy guy from a Halloween movie.’’
’’If you think you look ugly in a document, check mine out."
"My advice is: Never become a blonde!"
"Leonardo DiCaprio made a joke at the American Movie Awards ceremony. He said, "Do you engrave Oscars every year? How would I know?""
"This was in my dentist's waiting room."
"My boss and I had an ugly sweater competition."
"So my friend went to the DMV on Halloween..."
"New workout plan."
"When there is nothing to talk about"
"Job search"
"It happened. I'm a Disney princess now!"
"Rice bear under cheese blanket, or...an alien?"
“When you look more like Harry Potter than Harry Potter!”
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So have you talked to your psychiatrist about your tattoo fixation yet?
Comes with fortune cookie!
you got that two times?
better believe it
#56
so thats the 500$ stand