1

“Giving a friend’s child (10 yo) an illusion of choice to get them to do something you want them to do. So instead of saying “put your socks on”, say “do you want these socks, or these ones”. Or same for dinner. Not “Eat your dinner”. Ask, “do you want peas or brocolli?” They feel ownership of their choice and some control in their life. Kids in general, have very little control over their lives and they need practice to make decisions.”

2

“When my kids were younger if I thought they were lying, I would ask them to stick out their tongue. They thought I could tell from the colour of their tongue whether they were lying or not. In reality, it was that they would hesitate before sticking out their tongue that told me if they were lying or not.”

3

“Tell your kids that chores will be done after your nap and they will let you hibernate through the winter without any distractions.”

4

“When upset callers would rant and start to curse and yell, I’d interrupt with “Wow, I am really sorry that you feel you have to talk to me this way in order for me to help you. You don’t, but I understand. I’ll let you talk and then I am going to help you. I am sorry I interrupted you; you were saying?

They would either apologize, change their tone or hang up. I was fine with either one.”

5

“I worked at an insurance agency where a lot of customers were crabby or rude. I’ve rented in the area for a decade, so I’ve gotten familiar with all of the parks in town. I’d look at their address and say “Oh! You live right by Kingston Park. I walk my dog there all the time!” Their attitudes did a 180. They didn’t want to be jerks to somebody they might encounter in real life.”

6

“One of my favorite tricks I use on myself is, when I can’t sleep, I just curl into the most comfy position, close my eyes and pretend really hard that it’s 6 am and I have to get up. I don’t know why, but it makes me fall asleep real quick.”

7

“Telling people “thank you for letting me know” when they’re critical or giving unsolicited advice. Totally throws them off.”

8

“Owning up to my mistakes with full, if not excessive, ownership. It tends to disarm the offended.”

9

“When someone is yelling at you in public, I always remain calm and nonexpressive. Not giving them the reaction they want and escalating makes them feel/look goofy.”

10

“Toss a coin to reveal how you feel about a decision. if you wish it went the other way, do the other thing. if it’s “oh, yeah, that’s fine”, stick with the coin.”

11

“Actually this one came in my mind -To avoid workplace drama and be well liked is to just compliment people behind their back.”

12

“My son is neurodivergent. If I just go up to him and tell him it’s time to go, there’s major pushback. If I tell him we’re going in 5 minutes, he has a bit of time to prepare for a shift in focus and will happily follow me. This works with anything with him. I’ve told his teachers and they find out quickly that you’ve got to give him that heads up or it’s a major pain in the @$$ to get him switched.”

13

“When getting a client’s background (social services) and they bring up their kids, ask to see a photo or ask something that triggers a proud parent response. Accelerates the process of building trust.”

14

“If you want someone to like you, ask them for their opinion or help in something you know they are good at. People like to feel important and needed, so you fill a need by asking, so they automatically view you positively. “

15

“Not sure how well it actually works, but one good one is saying thank you instead of sorry. Like ”thank you for waiting” instead of ”sorry for being late”. It draws attention away from the negative.”

16

“Asking “would you be opposed to doing X?” instead of “would you be willing to do X?”.

17

“Listening to happy music can actually make you happier. Those lyrics are affirmations. If you keep repeating lyrics that says you’re a piece of sh#t or you’re not worthy you’ll end up believing it.”