"Back when printers at home were rare I had a woman come into my store asking for t-shirt transfer paper. I explained to her multiple times how to use them. Print on the paper then pin to shirt then iron.
30 minutes later she came back with the printer and paper wanting a refund because the shirt got stuck in the printer."
"I didn’t make your drink wrong, Amy. You ordered a large hot drink, and immediately after paying the barista put out a small cold drink and yelled “Jennifer.” Then, Amy, you picked it up and took a sip before realizing it was not your large, hot drink.
Shift lead sent me on break before I had a chance to fully explode."
"Back in the day I worked at Safeway and a woman walked up to my meat counter and started asking me where a specific sale item was, like $1 a pound chicken or something. I tell her that’s not sale we have. And she starts SCREAMING. “YOU PEOPLE ALWAYS DO THIS! YOU BAIT AND YOU SWITCH! YOU ADVERTISE ONE THING AND THEN REFUSE TO HONOR THE PRICE! EVERYTIME SINGLE TIME I COME HERE AND IM SICK OF IT!” She then shoves the store ad in my face and aggressively points at the $1 a pound chicken on sale. “Ma’am this is Safeway. That’s a Kroger ad.” She looks at it and says “Oh. Oops.” And walks out as I stand there just freaking baffled."
"I spent 20+ minutes arguing with a middle aged woman trying to return a XXL stack of men’s underwear (against policy once opened). I explained that if her husband had a 32 inch waist like me she needed to buy him Medium size underwear.
She eventually and angrily shouted “Look, he’s got a huge cock and he needs XXL pants for it but these keep falling down when he wears them!!!!”
She would not accept my explanation that the tag size related to his waist not his junk. she raged out of the shop leaving the stack of pants behind."
"Customer: “Hi, I’d like some sliced chicken lunch meat, what you got?”
Me: “We carry oven roasted, buffalo, and garlic & herb.”
Customer: You’re not understanding me boy! I want sliced chicken lunch meat, now what you got?”
Me: “Oven roasted, buffalo, or garlic & herb.”
Customer: “You’re still not gettin’ me son, I want sliced chicken lunch meat! Now tell me what you have, dammit!”
Me: “Oven roasted, chicken lunch meat. Buffalo, chicken lunch meat. Garlic and herb, chicken lunch meat.”
Customer: “Oh. Uhhhhh gimme some balogna.”
Still don’t know how I didn’t get in trouble for sassing that f@#ker."
"A woman tried to tell me yesterday PO Boxes no longer exist lol. I didn’t even bother. I was just like “oh, very strange.”"
“Why are you shut tomorrow?”
“Uhh…because its Christmas day?”
“But what if I need something?”
“You…youre in the store now? Just buy it now?”
“But I dont need it now!”“……”
"(Phone call when I worked in a hardware store)
“Good morning, <hardware store name>, how can I help you?”
“Hi there. I’d like to refill my prescription”
“Oh, I’m sorry – I think you have the wrong number. This is a hardware store”
<5 second pause>“
So you won’t help me refill my prescription?”
“What sort of prescription?”
“My birth control pill”
“OK well we’re a hardware store, so we don’t have birth control or any other medication”
“You’re not being very helpful at all”
And then she hung up…
I might have done society a disservice by not helping prevent her from procreating, come to think about it…"
"Worked in car parking customer service for a few years.
Had to explain to a lady why she was being charged for an hour and a half, instead of letting her out for free under the “half an hour free” rate … When her vehicle had been in the car park. Parked. For an hour and a half.
Her reasoning ?
“I only intended to stay 20 minutes”
“My system shows me you were here for an hour and a half”
“Yes, but I only intended to be here for 20 minutes”
“But…..you were ACTUALLY here for an hour and a half…”
Ended up having to explain over 5 minutes how rates work, and how you get charged for the time in the park.
Wild."
"It smells like dirt because it’s a greenhouse and that’s where we plant the plants."
"Used to work in a computer store, someone asked me once if a mouse mat would work with Windows 7. I worry about some people on this planet.."
"A chicken is an animal. Therefore it’s not vegetarian.
Worked in a vitamin store in college and was explaining to someone that vitamin D is extracted from lanolin in sheep’s wool, so it depended on if you were vegan or not.
And they hit me with fish and birds are not animals.
The specific thing she said: “What about a chicken? It’s not an animal, it’s a fowl!”
My assistant manager told her something like, “Oh well remember the 20 questions game? Is it animal, mineral, or vegetable? A chicken isn’t an a mineral or vegetable.”
They left in a huff and made huge complaints about us. Me in particular because I couldn’t believe how stupid they were (and I have no poker face).
I was not/am not cut out for retail."
"Why is the front of my dishwasher blue??
…did you remove the protective film?"
"Back when checks were popular, an older lady mistakenly wrote her check to Walmart when she was actually shopping in Kmart.
Instead of making the correction, she wanted to argue that she was shopping in a Walmart and that Kmart had gone out of business many years ago."
"I was a Maytag repairman. A customer brought in a multicolored felt mat and asked for a new one. I had to explain that was lint from the lint trap."
"Customer: What’s the difference between the 17-inch monitor and the 19-inch monitor?
Me: Two inches and 40 dollars.
Customer: But what’s the difference?
Me: This one is bigger by two inches, measured diagonally, and more expensive by 40 dollars.
Customer: No, but what’s the difference?!
This went on for several minutes. He left without making a purchase."
"The number of customers to whom I’ve had to explain the difference between left and right is greater than zero.
These have all been adults. I wish I were kidding."
"I once had a lady that wanted fresh dried fruit. I took her to the dried mango, banana chips, etc. no that wasn’t it. I took her to the raisins and figs. Nope. Out of ideas, I took her to the fruit preserves. Oh there it was. Grape jelly. She wanted grape jelly."
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